clickmom

Matt: even more awesome

Matt is in the AP art program in school, and this year, all the AP art kids did a "Haunted Hallway" the night before Halloween. Parents brought their children, and for a few bucks (all going to charity) the kids went through the art wing of the school, venturing into the different classrooms and being scared by the high school volunteers. If I do say so myself, Matt's room was the best. Matt's part was to play the mummy and stand in the corner and suddenly come alive,scare the group standing before him and chase them from the room, so the next group could enter and see the performance from the beginning.

We brought Evan and Josh in, but Evan was way to old for the activities, and Josh was on the fence. So we didn't hang around or anything, Matt was mostly there on his own, just like all the other completely independent high school students. When Matt was done with mummy-ing and the haunted hallway he came home and he told me all about some of the more stand out people he had met that night.

Matt told me the one time he broke character was while one unenthusiastic mother declared the event boring right in front of Matt and her small children. Matt said he broke character and gave the mom a lecture about lightening up and creating some mystery for kids so they could have a childhood. (snicker, I adore my son) Matt told me about a couple of fabulous moms too, but mostly he told me about one little boy, who came to the event in his own mummy costume and loved Matt's act. After the act, the mother asked if she could take a picture of Matt (the huge mummy) with her little boy, so Matt obliged. Then the little mummy kept coming back into Matt's room, so Matt made him the assistant mummy and included him in his act. According to Matt the little mummy hung out and scared visitors with him for quite some time. Isn't Matt the best (sweetest, tenderest, most thoughtful, warm hearted) teenager ever?

Wait folks, it gets better.

It turns out that the reason the little boy wore a mummy costume was to camouflage the surgical mask he had to wear across his mouth because he has leukemia. Matt wasn't clear about the rest of the story, but I suspect it involves a bone marrow transplant or maybe chemo.

I know, I know, (shaking my head) Matt is a saint, I am quite sure of that.

The mom was so grateful for what Matt gave to her son that night that she contacted Matt's AP art teacher and asked him if it would be okay if she wrote something up for the newspaper and sent in a story with Matt's and little mummy's picture.

Oy vey. (Fighting back the tears) I couldn't be a more proud mother than I am right at this very second, if I was any more proud of my boy I would burst into a million pieces. It would be like he had his very own ticker tape parade. Which he totally deserves.

aced

me: Matt? What is that on your toe?

Matt: Oh that .... ahhh, it's ink. I played tic tac toe on my toe! (smirk)

me: gulp (insert nervous tick here)With who?

Matt: I played by myself.

Evan brought home some tests to be signed. These are some words he used and spelled correctly: etiquette, positively, interact, and ventures. These are some words that Evan spelled incorrectly (with interpretations) nomadar (no matter), choas (chaos) and rular (ruler). Go figure.

Last night I went to that photographers meeting. The photographers gathered and only some brought work to share. We all signed a sheet to indicate if we had brought work in and then two by two we put our work on display and the other members would take a close up view and then sit down to critique the work. I listened without commenting to the first couple of critiques so that I could size up the people there and before long I could tell which was the guy who has a lot to say but doesn't know much, which was the guy who is a mover and shaker and going somewhere, and who was the guy who is old school and stuck in his ways, and a few other characters too.

I was loving every second of disecting a photo, my mind was in overdrive, and as the photographers revolved and put up piece after piece I became more and more alive.

When my turn to display work came around I went up to the front, put up 5 landscapes that I had taken this summer, and told the audience that I was thick skinned and that they need not hold back with their opinions. For a few seconds no one said a thing and I just stood up there awkwardly, smiling and looking around hoping for a hand in the air or a gesture or anything at all... and then the guy that I had pegged as the mover shaker spoke up from all the way in the back corner and he said "Cool ... Cool" while nodding his head in approval and then everyone agreed that they loved my photos and that my photos were painterly and the photographers said pretty much only nice things and nothing negative and I was happy and very excited that my stuff was well liked.

I never really know how other people will react to my stuff because it's all so personal to me. Especially since 3 of the 5 landscapes were utopian and the other 2 were shot with my point and shoot (gasp!) from the car while crossing the Tappanzee Bridge (husband was driving!) The other photographers even thought the graininess of the point and shoot added to the ambience of the photo. I'm telling you, I was totally having a Sally Field moment. They loved me! THEY REALLY LOVED ME!

I was so excited I couldn't stop talking or even settle down and go to sleep last night. It was great.

RUN!

Evan: I hit this ball all the way from one side of the yard over the fence on the other side.

me: Hey! That sounds like a good hit! Wait, which fence?

Evan: That one...

me: The fence where the new neighbors are? What happened?

Evan: Well, I heard someone yell and then they threw the ball back.

me: Did you hit one of boys?

Evan: No! It sounded like the mom..

me: YOU HIT THE MOM!

Evan: NO, it sounded more like maybe I surprised her, like ball fell near her. I mean.... She threw it back....

me: What did you say? Did you say "Sorry"?

Evan: uh .... no .... I said "RUN!"

I wuv my boyz

I am too much of a techno-dunce to actually embed this video, so you'll have click over to see it. Wait, I think I did it! I heard this event happening behind closed doors and contemplated sneaking upstairs to spy out a video for myself but I didn't have to! Luckily for me Matt was already making one. Sorry about that. And you should know that it is not Matt's real voice. He is doing a plankton imitation here.

guilty

So, after an excrutiating long morning of nursing home meetings, hospice workers (still swimming in adoration for them by the way), and finally a trip to the funeral home to make pre-arrangements, I found myself strewn across Boops's couch staring blankly at a yawner of a Dr. Phil episode. It worked for me. I was brain dead.

Our kids are playing downstairs. Another boy, Evan's age, is over too.

Towards the end of the show, Boops turns to me and says in a dreamy kind of unimpressed tone, "I am concerned about that other boy being scarred down there." We discuss how first born children can be so innocent and unsuspecting when playing with the more savvy younger siblings.

Then Boops's kid marches into the room and says "Click! Can you make Evan stop!?!?!" "Stop what?" the moms, suddenly sitting up straight and now quite alert, answer in unison. "Well, he did this thing with a scarf ... he's wearing it and he calls it his man-thong."

uke

I have been watching Nip Tuck this summer. (season 4 spoiler alert!) In a later episode, the married doctor has a one night stand and regrets it. The complication is that the girl keeps showing up in his life and the audience gets the idea that she is going to be a stalker fatal attraction type. And then the doctor and his affair girl are arguing while walking down the street and the girl stops to turn around and say something big to the doctor (a threat maybe?) and WHAM a bus slams into her and she is dead. I loved that! And don't we all wish it could be that easy to get rid of those kind of people in our lives? Well, I certainly do!

I could go on forever about grandma. I have been telling everyone about her condition just to see how they react to the thought of amputating her leg even though it will not extend her life. Scumcle had the doctor from the wound care center call me today and that doctor told me that he thought that amputating grandma's leg as a pain reducing measure was the "gold standard" he was taught in medical school. It will not extend her life or cure her MRSA infection. That doctor said that the other alternative was to "snow her with narcotics until she is unconscious and let her die of pneumonia." I hate that doctor. I hated his pompous and callous attitude. And most of all I hate that scumcle happened to meet the one vascular surgeon who thinks that the "gold standard" treatment for grandma at her age and in her condition is amputation.

Am I crazy to think that amputation is over the top? I am starting to wonder if maybe it is me who needs the reality check, or maybe I just need that damned bus. Not for grandma! For the scumcle!

But what I really want to talk about tonight is Matt. When Matt got home from camp and finally stopped all that crying he asked me if he could find a project to keep him busy. I said "sure!" and Matt told me that he had been looking at some web sites that sold kits for making instruments. Matt decided on a ukulele. (I know, I know, we all thought of about a million Tiny Tim Jokes too!)

The Uke came and Matt had to go to Home depot for a small fortune in tools, and then he realized that building a uke was way harder than he had imagined. Luckily for Matt there were handy men around still working on our house, and when Matt approached them with questions they embraced his project and made themselves available and let Matt set up a little work station right next to theirs. And for the past couple of weeks it was not uncommon for me to look outside and see Matt standing in a circle of 3 or 4 workmen discussing the uke and what to do next with it.

One afternoon I saw Matt outside by himself bouncing and strumming and I thought for a second he had finished. So I got on my toes and I looked harder and I realized that Matt had merely tucked the body of the not as yet finished uke under his arm and was air strumming and fingering the parts that he hadn't built yet. He was so cute!

Well, Matt finished the uke today and he was so excited! And he played and played and he played Tip Toe, (you knew he would!) and he played some Sponge Bob song, and he played around with chords, finding some familiar chord patterns from random songs he recognizes.

It was great to see my man/boy so thrilled with his little project. As we were stringing the uke and Matt was anxious as to whether the uke was really going to work or not he announced that even if the uke made a horrible sound he was going to hang it on his wall and be proud of his effort.

heated exchange

CITY FRIEND/COUNTRY FRIEND

EV: Those gutters are so pimp!

L: I know!

Next day:

Ev: T! Look at those gutters! They're so pimp!

T: No, they are copper.

Ev: No, they are pimp!

T: No they are 100% copper.

Ev: No, they are 100% pimp!

T: Y'all know what, there is no such thing as a metal called pimp.

Ev: They are 100% pimp!

T: Y'all know what, I'm going to ask your mom.

(T finds me loading the dishwasher as usual)

T; Click, what metal are the gutters made out of?

Me: Copper.

T: See! I knew it! Evan said they were pimp!

me: .........................

(pause for processing)

Bwah ha ha ha!

why did I say that?

scene: Matt and I are sitting in the room adjacent to the room where my dad is channel surfing. Matt and I are discussing a ska riff that Matt has composed and recorded on his lap top. Matt and I both happen to look up at the very same moment to see the television right at the exact split second dad pauses on the playboy channel. There is a woman posing in a football jersey which is pushed up over her breasts. Her nipples are retouched. They are blurred out. The effect is bizarre.

me: (Look at Matt. Feel the need to explain) PopPop is watching the playboy channel.

Matt: (Givs me the raised eye brow look)

me: (mistakenly thinking I am funny) Maybe you can watch together!

Matt: I find the thought of that particularly unsettling.

head slapper

Josh has forgone swimming for much of this summer and has spent a good chunk of what should have been swimming time either calling to his friends from the dock or in an inflatable raft hovering near his swimming friends. At first I thought it was because he had been swimming on a rough water day and had been frightened by some big waves. Then I realized that he was afraid to go in the water because one of the utopian kids kept telling him that he was seeing snapping turtles and other creatures swimming in the water. I tried to tell Josh that I was sure the wildlife spotting kid was lying since he was the one kid who was always in the water for hours at a time. But Josh wasn't buying any of it and he wasn't going near the water either.

On the way back to utopia after picking Evan and Matt up from their camps I explained to them that I needed their help and I told them what was going on with Josh and the water. I told Matt and Ev that I had not been able to convince Josh to be as comfortable as he used to be around the water. On the very first evening here I saw Evan whispering to Josh on the dock. Josh turned to Evan and smiled and counted down and the two of them leaped right into the water and began splashing and swimming around.

I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I was thrilled, so I swam close to Evan and whispered my thanks to him. I asked him what magic words he came up with to ease Josh's fears. Evan looked at me like I was an idiot and he said "I told him I'd play with him if he swam with me."

Yeah, DUH!

camp letter

Dear Matt,

Leaving you at camp yesterday was such a mixed bag of emotions for me. I was so proud and happy of the young man you have become. I know you know that, but watching you confidently stroll around the camp really brought it home for me. It warmed my heart to see the smiles spread across the faces of the campers and the counselors as they realized who you are. It was obvious to me that you are a well liked and enjoyed contributor there at camp, and that only ads to my already swollen with motherly pride heart.

And as I told you 66 kajillion times (which you so graciously didn't clobber me for each and every time) I am going to miss you like crazy. I am going to miss your laugh, and that knowing look you give me when one of your brothers does or says something not kosher, and I am going to miss your hugs and our jokes and teasing you about your hair, and the stink of your feet, (have they made you store your sandals outside the bunk yet?) and also just having another (almost) adult around to listen to me rant and someone with a level head to bounce ideas off of and also because you are my friend, my son. I really like you. (Not all moms can say that!)

The first few days are always the hardest for the mommy, you know that right?

Today I dragged your brothers around on some errands. We returned some school books I found lying around the house, and went to the bank to deposit some checks. I deposited some for you. There were three here from NaNa and PopPop's bar mitzvah stocks for you. We tried to go back to the barber for them to fix Evan's dumb looking hair disaster, but they aren't opened on Monday. Then Evan got to go to the dentist where he had two cavities filled WITHOUT NOVACAINE. So brave!

After that we grabbed Ev's pal, headed for the mall to pick up shorts and underwear for Ev and then we hung out with the Boop's family until dinner. We went out to eat together and I told Boops about your super mature blanket and she totally got the joke. Ev, however, was totally mortified, which I found fascinating, since it was Ev who dressed as a woman (complete with make up and high heels) last year for Halloween. We tried to explain to him how if you are cool about it then it's a big joke and everyone laughs WITH you instead of AT you, but he remained doubtful. Maybe in a few years he'll relax a little bit.

I love you darling,
Have fun .... and be serious about that video!
I expect to see something amazing from you.

Love, Mom