TISMF yesterday and today

Need to vent. Then I’m going to go walk the dog.

Holy Fucking moly. I took the husband to the wound care center for his weekly visit yesterday and they wanted to change his number of bandage changes from twice a week to three times a week because I, THE ONLY ONE WHO EVER GOT CLOSE TO HIS WOUND WITHOUT A MASK ON TOLD THEM IT IS FUNKY SMELLING and put they put in an order with the visiting nurse service for the visiting nurse and when they called me from the visiting nurse service I said that husband had a physical therapy appointment and a doctor appointment on Thursday and that we would need to work around that and then the visiting nurse told me that I could handle it myself WITH FUCKING ATTITUDE and I said that I could. Because I can and because he who doesn’t control his diabetes has been having foot ulcer issues on his feet that I have handled for him since we lived in Stepford and then this morning I got a call from the wound care center and she basically told me that I had no experience and was not qualified and fuck I just spent the last 20 minutes on the phone trying to get this sorted out and only left voice mails for a bunch of people. fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. The level of insulted I feel right now by this woman who has no idea what my history of taking care of Mr. Denial and his many illnesses is through the roof. But I’m not gonna argue with her because fuck it let her send a nurse who is less qualified and LESS EXPERIENCED WITH MY MENTALLY ILL HUSBAND than I am come in here and pretend to take of him. Let them try to get answers from my psycho death wish “nothing wrong with me” ball and chain life force sucking husband. I’ll step back and they’ll fucking kill him because he won’t tell them the truth and only I will know what’s going on. Fuckers. Arrogant fuckers.

I
AM
SO
ANNOYED

It’s not even that “I have been through so much”, it’s that I have nursed him through so many other foot ulcers and even the 2nd degree burns and that I am fully capable- IMHO more capable than the nurses who don’t understand his limitations and ease of lying. Also, I’m here almost 24/7. If something goes south on this wound it’s gonna be me who figures it out anyway. I hate being Fucking underestimated.

Also, now, it appears I most definitely have a resident skunk. Dammit. Went outside with sweet pea early last night around 7:30 and walked towards the back of the yard. Saw it COMING TOWARDS US on my way back to the house. Thankfully sweet pea can’t see for shit in the dark so when I took off running towards the back door and calmly called her to follow me she did so. I was never so sure she was about to get blasted. How long can this luck last? I mean, just a week ago she was running in circles around it barking and it didn’t blast her. I better stock up on peroxide. Might need a Costco sized bottle. Can you imagine if we both get blasted??? Oh my god. You’d have to put me in a drug induced coma until the stank wore off. There might not be enough peroxide in the world to help me through that.

But that’s the second time it came towards us. Does that mean it’s rabid? What wild animal would move towards a gigantic human and her large dog? A crazy one. Shoot.

I
DO
NOT
NEED
SKUNKS
IN MY LIFE.

Don’t be jealous but today I got to hang out with the wound care nurse when she was changing the husband’s foot ulcer bandages, and the physical therapist who put the husband through the paces, and then I got to hop into the car and take him for his monthly eyeball shot, where I yelled at and flipped off an old white woman who was shoveling egg salad into her pie hole in the waiting room despite the 837 signs which clearly stated that she was in a medical facility where masks were required. Also despite the fact that first I informed one of the ladies at the desk who asked her sweetly to put her mask on. She called me fatso.

Then on the way home I got to grocery shop and go to the pharmacy for some of the husband ’s drugs.

Don’t be jealous. You can’t compare. This life is special.

A SPECIAL KIND OF HELL.