Here are all the things I could have told a story about in the past week or so.
I messed up big the day after the bird photographing. Husband had two doctor appointments, I went to the wrong one first, tried to speed off to the other one, the 1 5 minute drive took 30 minutes due to the entire state being on the roads of this particular town at the very moment I needed to zip through and we couldn't get to the other appointment in time. It was his eye doctor appointment that I caused him to miss it and I felt AWFUL about it because he has been complaining about his vision on one side (his legally blind side, so that makes it kind of worse) for weeks. Couldn't get a new appointment for 3 weeks. GUILT CITY.
But then I yawned in the car and noticed he didn't yawn after I yawned so I tried to fake yawn a couple of times and got no response from him. I tried so hard because I had just scrolled a social media post claiming that lack of yawn reciprocity means that someone is a psychopath, but it is my belief that dementia causes the same lack or responsiveness. Or maybe he just a psychopath. But at least he is a psychopath that I can out think, out run, and definitely out strength. So, I feel pretty safe here.
I got an MRI of the spot under my nose which swelled up and had stuff coming out of it because it's been numb for years, but not fucking leaking, and I cannot get the doctor to call me with the results. Tomorrow I will be going to his office and making the sweetest fuss until I walk away with a copy of the report. But I am going to do it in such a nice way. I will also not hesitate to warn anyone who happens to be in the waiting room to find another practice because holy shit. These people don't even answer their own phones... EVER. Why do doctor's offices have so much trouble being nice to patients? Can't they even try to determine if I am going to go all Karen on them before they ignore me? Jeezus. I thought that the doctor and I had a great rapport. Must be those front desk nurses. Maybe the doctor is actually a creep who just put on a show for me. I don't know but, holy unprofessional! This place has unlocked a new level of achievement in that department.
I wore a pair of sneakers for the first time in about 3 years and walking on squishy insoles was a completely bizarre feeling and now I know why those first shoes for babies have only a leather strip on the bottom. Squishy is weird, folks! My friend was shocked that I had not worn sneakers in that long. She asked me what I wore on my feet. I said "hiking boots", this girl takes her daily hike seriously!
I got to all of my kids. The husband and I went to see 21, 25 came here for Father's Day and then I drove to see 29 and afterwards I spent a couple of hours with my old stepford friends on the way back. I saw them from afar and all of their hair looked awful from a distance. Just dried out and frizzy. The one with red hair had an unnatural hue happening (home dye job), and the one with dark chocolate brown hair let someone lighten her hair and give her "chunky" streaks, NO Everything was wrong with that look, and the blonde, her hair just looked bleached to a crisp. SO, when red turned around and exclaimed "You're letting your hair go gray!" upon laying eyes on me, I had to laugh at myself. I handled her criticism well though. I said "That's nothing", because my hair was down and I pulled the side up so she could marvel at my extra frosty sideburns. I love my gray hair. I don't care what any commercial tries to tell me, I earned every single one of these grays, my color is perfect and quite appropriate for my age and I am not going to color them. If you're my age and you don't have some grays I think you look weird.
Speaking of weird. The radicalized freak in my neighborhood has a new vinyl sign hanging above his fence. The new sign says "elect a clown expect a circus" which could not be more opposite world thinking if he tried. Sometimes I wish he was a comedian and these nutty signs were actually satire.
I wish I had a really fantastic last name like Drinkwater. (jeopardy contestant)
And lastly, I woke up at 4:40 yesterday so that I could photograph the slim crescent moon in dim light so I could see it better. I couldn't see it from my yard, so I jumped into the car with the intent of going to the beach but I saw the moon just as I passed the high school so I turned into the HS parking lot. I let sweet pea out of the car to do her business and ofcourse, she ended up chasing a fox and I got to enjoy hearing a fox "bark" at her. That fox bark is hilarious.I think that in the animal world it must be the equivalent of my rinky dink Toyota clown car horn. My horn is such a cartoon sounding horn that I do not use it.
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