Hungry

I didn’t really eat for three days and no one noticed.

I’ve been thinking about my typical pre-diet anxiety and how I have a neurotic need to eat all my favorite foods one more time before officially beginning, as if those foods will cease to exist and I need to say goodbye. And then I never start because there is always one more thing I want to eat. I know. I said NEUROTIC. I own it.

So, I thought, maybe it would work for me if I just dieted part time. And then I remembered that one vacation where I arrived stressed out of my mind and the husband knew this camel’s back was a single straw from breaking so he told me to get a massage on the first day and the wonderful woman who gave me a massage suggested I eat only fruit and vegetables for a few days to give my insides a rest. So that’s what I did and I felt great.

So I went to the store and bought a fresh fruit and vegetables and that’s what I did. For three days. I didn’t eat meals with the husband and Josh and no one noticed.

Then I had two normal days and this feels maintainable so I think I’m going to try going in this direction for a bit. I need to get this pandemic weight off. Then I need to get the graduate school weight off. Then I need to get the moving and hating new town weight off and then I need to get the I was fat since having kids in the first place weight off. I just need to be normal chubby. I’d give a toe if I could just wake up and live easily in my pre-children body.