It's the first day of the 5th week of virtual lockdown. I say virtual because without a legitimate government no one has enforced this, I'm doing it (and forcing it on the husband and Josh) on my own due to fear of suffering and then dying. You know, basic stuff.
It's been 8 days since my last grocery store run and I'm feeling like I definitely did not get myself infected. Whew!! I guess those panic attacks were for naught.
Now Ive got to see how long I can go before needing to refresh that supply again. Hopefully at least 2 more weeks. Its the fresh veggies that call to me. Also, I think I prefer to see the fridge packed. It's comforting.
Anyways, I've been stepping outside into my own backyard with my camera, which is great. I mean, even if I don't take a single image, just having it in my hand does something for me. I think that might be called purpose. All I know is that it changes everything in a solid good way.
One of the more challenging aspects of lockdown for me has been maintaining a normal schedule. Without my daily walks (or more recent exercise trips to the Y) it's tough to get that "go to bed" signal at the end of the day. So I just get sucked into the television and end up staying awake way later than I normally would. I try to get to sleep by 1. I get firm with myself around 12:30. But that means I'm sleeping until 8 or even 8:30 and that just blows my mind. It's like sleeping half the day away. Morning is my productive time! Though I hardly doubt you could call more than a few hours out of the last month productive.
I wonder a lot about how I will feel and think once we can kind of get back to normal. I know I am feeling like it has been silly to put so much of my life on hold the past few years. (Which has been gradually been increasing until I was feeling quite intensely suffocated with the responsibility of the husband since last summer) One thing for sure I am going to do once this hell pandemic is over is buy new underwear. I was expecting them to just drop into my lap or something but at the end of the day I totally deserve new underwear. Some of what I'm wearing I bought right before I started grad school in 2013. It looks like 7 year old underwear. It's so thread bare that I've put my finger through some. What the heck me? We aren't that desperately poor!
One of the first things I will need to do is get my myself to a chiropractor. I won't need to drive all of the way back to step ford because this is a neck issue, I can go to the new town woman. She is good with necks. Also, I like her because after 3 visits I am always right where I want to be. She is effective. Right now the deal is my neck. It's so bad Ive had a headache for weeks (more than 2) and my right arm is sometimes going numb. I know what you're thinking. It's not a stroke. I can speak clearly, think clearly, stick my tongue out straight etc..... I checked. It's some kind of strange neck and inflammation combo. I've been eating milk products so a couple of days off of them and the inflammation should start heading south. I'm starting now. No more dairy. I owe myself an apology. I wish I was on lock down with people who had the same restrictions as I do. It is my dream to have a completely safe home where there isn't any allergic to food I can indulge in.
So, it's Saturday and that means nothing special other than the regular daytime shows which bore me will be replaced by some other dreadful day time shows that are guaranteed to bore me. Maybe I should edit and print out a photo book just for giggles. Hmmmm. I'm thinking this one over.
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