When bear bait walks across the floor I can hear her feet slapping the wood. She walks as if she has big clown shoes on. It makes me sad. I've been walking her for only a mile or maybe an occasional mile and a half at a time. She isn't full out limping, she just moves like an old dog now. I drive to where I walk her just so I can do the entire walk in the pleasant atmosphere of the fields and not waste precious walk mileage on walking next to the street to get to the fields. Also because people in new town drive INSANE and I am not exaggerating. They scare me.
In the mean time I started to have an upset stomach in the end of August. I attributed it to stress, since the summer was soon to be over and unwelcomed real life was looming large over me. Well, the upset stomach turned into stuff you don't want to see in the bowl and now I am scheduled for a colonoscopy on Thursday. ick. There is more though, and more means swelling and tenderness and just about every symptom (except weight loss, it is NEVER weight loss) for a variety of cancers, including but not even close to limited to peritoneal mesothelioma (my mom's asbestos related cancer). Damn you Dr. Google!! I'm pretty sure people don't usually think "If I was going to havecancer sylptoms this would be an excellent time for it to happen" but the timing? Not ideal. I feel like I have a lot on my plate. I'm always worried abou the husband's health and I really feel like nothing should be allowed to happen that overshadows that. I can not multi-worry and I can not be sick! I've pretty much turned into that annoying old lady who only eats steamed chicken breasts and bland foods. Damn my stomach.
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