For the past two years the husband has been spending half the week sleeping in a company owned apartment near his new job up near new town. That is why we are moving. He typically goes up late on Sunday nights to be there for his early Monday morning meetings.
Since he got out of the hospital last Tuesday I have done my share of wifely nagging (oh, how I HATE to have to nag) both verbally and with the laser vision glare of disapproval. I have also done a good deal of medication, bandaging, antibiotic ointment application supervision. When the husband walked out the door to go to the apartment so he could be back at work for the first time in 2 weeks this evening I found myself in tears.
Why was I crying?
Because I am physically and emotionally exhausted? Absofreakinglutely sure.
Because I found out that Evan had taken it upon himself to have a man to man with the husband? Yes. It rips my heart to shreds that the kids might feel responsible if the worst happens.
Because Evan slapped the husband on the back and told him that he was proud of the husband for the way he had taken control of his food? O.M.G.
Also because I just don't trust the husband to be on top of his new regime. I need to be there, or he needs to be here so I can make sure he is doing everything the same as I would do it, by the book. Medication before he eats, constant blood sugar monitoring, soaking and bandaging. I'm afraid at what I'll see Wednesday night when he comes back.
This is a bad bad thing for a constant worrier like me. I don't know how to stop.
I know it's hard, but let it go. You didn't create the problem, you are not responsible for his behavior and the kids need to believe in their dad's resolve and determination to get healthy.
If he stumbles, I know you will be there to pick up the pieces. If he does what he is supposed to do, you can be proud of him and more secure.
He has to find a way to take care of himself and to care what happens to himself, to you and to the kids.
A diabetic craving sugar and carbs is just like any other addict. Addiction is addiction and you can't control it in anyone but yourself.
Get back on the bike and keep riding!
Posted by: The Editor | April 18, 2011 at 07:17 AM