clickmom

First Bon fire of the summer

frustrated

Evan goes to his camp tomorrow and that makes me all uptight.  My house is a MESS, serious disaster and I can not do a thing about it with the tv blaring and the kids yammering away at me.  I'm super stressed, I'm not getting a much needed simultaneous break from my kids this summer, and frigging time refuses to stand still so I can catch up.  I feel like if I don't make it to the posh club tomorrow morning I am going to explode, so hopefully I'll roll over around 6 before anyone is up and head out the door.  It's going to be a long hard day and I am going to need all those exercise endorphins in order to NOT kill someone before I lay back down tomorrow night.

On the bright side, I am fairly certain I saw one of the bunnies this afternoon in a spot where I often see the mama bunny.  I turned around to screech the good news let the kids know and in the two seconds I wasn't looking the bunny disappeared.  I'm sure it was one of our cutie pie nesters though.  I gotta be a believer.

reflective victories

First:  The bunnies have abandoned me.  Yesterday there was the one still there in the nest, but after I photographed him he hopped away and today there wasn't a bunny to be seen.  I am hoping that tomorrow if I wake up real early I can spot them (with my 200 mm lens) hopping about on my back lawn, but I'm not confident.  I think they may have had enough of me shoving my big old lens in their cute little furry bunny faces and totally split.  Also, my back yard neighbor has an outdoor cat, so I am fearful.  On my run this morning I saw bunnies on just about every other lawn in the neighborhood.  I'm pretty sure we are being over run.  I hope my own are okay!

Second: This morning I really needed a day of rest after working out pretty hard every day last week, but I was ANXIOUS because today was the day that Matt goes to camp for 8 weeks, (and YES, I cried half the way down and half the way back without him)  and I knew that if I at least ran for a little bit this morning I'd feel a whole lot better.  I knew I didn't have much spark in me, and one step outside into the airlessness of 99% humidity, which is the garden state, and I hoped that the the devil would be able to accompany me, since I knew that my run was going to be her only chance at exercise for the day.  We ran for 30 sultry humid minutes and returned to the house so that the devil could lie face down in her water bowl and I could continue to drip sweat for a full 5 minutes before re-establishing a normal body temperature.  I time my runs, so I never really know how fa I end p going, but I do know that today I did not go my normal distance.  I t was like running through soup out there.  Also, it rained on me twice during the run.  I suspect that it wasn't actually rain but more like extra heavy dampness because that is was it felt like.

The other day when the cranial sacral therapist was here and she heard me explaining to Josh how we are going to exercise a lot this summer (I will whip that couch potato kid of mine into shape!) and how if you exercise a lot you feel really good after and that I go to the posh club all of the time because I like it and not because I feel like I have to and then the cranial sacral therapist chimed in with "That's because you are an addict personality."  And Dammit!  She is totally right there.  But I think I am going to fully embrace the addiction of exercise and let it rule over the addiction of all things sweet, salty, fried (or any delish combination of the those) and make exercise my go to release in place of the old hand to mouth action.  Face it, that hand to mouth action hasn't worked for me for years and it's time to move on!   

AMAZING NEWS:  One landmark accomplishment I have been looking and looking for to no avail for is abdominal definition.  I've been pretty down about my seeming lack of abdominal definition for a while now, and then a couple of days ago I got a glance of myself from a distance in the bathroom mirror and with different lighting there was that line that means muscles down the sides and then yesterday I was standing sideways to the bathroom mirror and I saw it again (and again today just to make sure it was true) and I realized that it IS there and it just doesn't show when I am standing up close to the mirror with it's top mounted lights.  I have ABS people!  (tears of joy stream down my cheeks)

Preparing: Today I found out that you can buy kettlebells at Target.  There is a Target close enough to utopia.  I will buy them if I feel the need.  I do have some resistance bands, a ball for doing sit ups n, and some free weights in utopia already.  (and I can do pushups etc...)  They should hold me over until the other things show up.  I did order the Insanity challenge and also a TRX band.  That Insanity challenge is going to really do me in, but I am going to give it my best. I want to take my fitness to a new level and that kind of cardio- body weight resistance is not my strength, so that is why I need to own it.  Give me 60 days.  Maybe I'll take before and after photos.

Speaking of after, I used the bathroom in Matt's bunk before hitting the road to come home and I barely recognized myself when I glanced my reflection in the mirror.  I just wasn't registering to myself as huge.  It was weird.

Last one in the nest

I put a quarter next to him so you could see how small he is.

stuff I eat up

Bunnies first:  Typepad is being a big wiener and won't let me show you the bunnies.  I have some shots from yesterday I would have liked to share and didn't take any today (I gave my models the bunnies the day off because we unveiled them to so many people I didn't want to bother them even one more time) so what I will do is take some low quality iphone3 (sniff, I'm not current on my iphone technology)  photos tomorrow and see if I can download all 2 mega pixels straight from the phone.  For anyone who is wondering:  The look like completely adorable big headed miniature bunnies.  And YES!  It is nearly impossible not to kiss and cuddle them every minute of the day.  Instead I just stare longingly towards the nest from my kitchen or family room.   Wildmom feels the same way, she is much less likely to actually touch the bunnies, but she did leave some fresh organic romaine leaves out there for mama bunny to snack on when she made her nightly pit stop to nurse the babies before stealing away into the night this evening.  Also, wildmom verified that the bunnies did grow a tremendous amount since she had seen them last on Wednesday.

Now all about me:  It is kind of ridiculous how easily swayed I am by the just the least little positive reinforcement.  On Wednesday I told the stretcher I was thinking of taking Thursday off (ummm ..... there may have been a margarita party at my house Wednesday night~ ahem) from working out and I said I might not be able to come to boxing Thursday evening and the stretcher said "You can come.  Come."  in a very no nonsense kind of father's knows best kind of way.   I thought to myself that truly there was nothing else I was going to be doing that was more important than taking care of myself Thursday between 6-7.  And also, maybe he wanted me to be there, which was so flattering.  So, I went to boxing.  And it was a great workout.  Then we paired off for boxing and the stretcher ended up being my boxing my partner and I was afraid because the dude has some serious muscles and I didn't want to get hurt.  I said to the stretcher "Are you going to hit me? Don't hurt me." and he didn't hurt me, and I'm not sure if it was because he was exhausted after 13 hours of being a trainer on Thursday or if he was just being nice.  I think he was exhausted.

Other nice things that have happened to me lately.  (I eat this kind of thing right up) On the last day of school a mom I have chatted with on occasion made it a point to come over to me and whisper in my ear  "I don't know what you've been doing but keep it up, you look great."

During my Monday night photo class one of the other students asked me if I had kids.  I said I did, and pointed to a photo of Josh and said "That's my baby" she asked how many kids I have and I said I have three, and then she looked at Josh's picture and said "When you called him your baby you meant he is your oldest right?" and I said "No, he's my baby, my youngest." and then the women asked me how old my oldest is and when said 17 she looked like she was going to faint.  It seemed incomprehensible to her that I had a 17 year old.  (gobble gobble, I eat that up!) 

And finally today I was working out with the stretcher in a private session and at the end I was too tired to go on because I had already interval climbed the stair mill for 30 minutes (level 7! woot woot) before hand.  Being so exhausted like that makes my back hurt, so I told the stretcher I wanted to stop 5 minutes early and he said "Let me stretch your back for you."  I was already sitting on my mat with my feet extended out in front of me and he told me to put my palms on the floor and slide them as far forward as I could.  He leaned down behind me and gently pushed me more forward from my lower back and then he braced himself and told me to try to straighten up and I straightened up, except he was pushing on me and didn't think I was going to be able to push back so hard and he tumbled back and said "HOLY SH!T!  I CAN'T BELIEVE HOW STRONG YOU ARE!"  I really really like being so (yeah baby!) strong.  

On the fly

Just posting an iPhone shot on the fly tonight. The bunnies totally look like bunnies and their ears are all the way up. They still want to be in the dark and as soon as I surprise them they all moon me trying to face the nest. Two bunnies are huge. Two are kind of puny. What's up with that? Gender?

The stretcher came up with new stretch in an awkward position. He doesn't mind. I was eyes wide open waiting for someone to jump out and tell me I was being punked. But I wasn't. Use your imagination. It would be possible to have relations in that position. I am fascinated in a watching something incomprehensible kind of way.

My babes are coming over for margaritas tonight. Woo hoo!

those bunnies and my bunnies

Okay, if the bunnies aren't sun fearing vampires, maybe they just refuse to use sunscreen after the damning sunscreen report that came out this last week, or they just might be teenagers relating to me as a substitute mother figure in which case they hate my guts and refuse to look at me.  In which ever case, they continue to nose dive into the deepest crevice of bunny nest every time I go out there armed with my big old bad ass camera and they won't cooperate at all.  Today I was not being patient and the kids were breathing down my neck to leave for the beach, so I kind of got the same old bunny from the top shot I keep showing you over and over.  You can't really tell but they grow a noticeable amount each day.  It's kind of startling.  Tomorrow I will try to get some new angle for you.

 

Today was THANKFULLY the last of school for the kids.  At Josh's school they have a tradition of "clapping out" the oldest kids and tossing confetti on them.  Matt and Ev really wanted to be there to clap Josh out but I got confused about the timing and they ran in just after the big brouhaha.  That did not step them from cornering Josh on the playground and getting the deed done though.

Obviously Evan takes much pleasure in  doing anything questionable to Josh.  I'm never sure when and if I should step in.  Sometimes Josh laughs right through the torture and sometimes he laughs until he cries.  One of the more annoying things Evan had taken to doing to Josh is yelling "Scoops!" and "scooping" his chest.  Today, while in the car with all 3 kids,  I asked Evan to stop and discontinue the whole "Scoop" thing.  Evan assured me that Josh enjoyed it.  So I asked Josh and he thought and he said "Well, Evan scooping me wasn't on the top of my to do list but I'm fine with it."  Matt and I were just about crying in the front seat trying to hold back the laughter.  

Did I mention that Josh won an award for having the most advanced vocabulary in his school?  The principal was so impressed with Josh's test scores that he called to tell me just how in the dust Josh left every other kid in the school.  I could have guessed that result.  The kid astonishes me every day with what comes out of his mouth. 

Beach

daily dose of bunny

They are always huddled close to each other when I peel back the grasses to get my daily peek.  I don't think they want to be bothered by anyone who doesn't intend on feeding them. It might be because I tend to go out there an hour or so before the mama rabbit shows up.  They are probably hungry.  I can't believe how fast they are growing.

They don't seem to be ready to handle the light, even though I am careful to uncover them once the nest in the shade.  They always scramble to hide their heads under a dirt ridge and then I can only see bunny butt, which is adorable but not nearly as adorable as their faces.  The smallest one is still curious, and I am worried about his eyes.  One is open, but the other looks weird.  I hope he doesn't have an infection or anything bad. 

 

I did the interval program on the stair mill today.  Level 8!  I thought it was going to be the end of me.  I was pretty wiped by the time I got around the working with the stretcher, who told me today that he thinks I would prefer the px90 to the insanity challenge. Now I really don't know what to do about summer exercising.  

Tomorrow I am running, which always seems like a day off since there is no weight lifting involved.  I did read somewhere that if you interval run you engage your core and I tried that last time and can see what the article means, so I will be interval running in the morning.

I vow to the world wide web that I will not purchase any more gluten/dairy free muffin 4 packs.  I am out of control.

 

Eyes!

I walked over to the nest a couple of times today just to say "Hi guys!" and watch the grass covering the bunnies move.   It feels kind of like peeking in on your sleeping kid for a breath or two before going to bed yourself.   I decided I would only really look at them once a day because I don't want to bother them too much.  I got my act together and haven't let the devil bother them for the last 2 days.   

This evening I waited until the sun was low enough that the nest wasn't in the light and then I headed out camera in hand.  But the mom was on the lawn!  So I turned around and I went back inside.  But then the mom hung around on the side of my yard munching some grass or something so I decided to go take my photos before it was too dark.

I was surprised to see that three of the four surviving bunnies had open eyes!  They are even cuter than before.  The open eyed bunnies did a couple of spastic jumping motions and then immediately scurried to bury their sweet little bunny faces into the deepest part of the bunny nest.  The one closed eyed bunny sniffed towards me, making me think that he is the one that always peeks out when I bother them, but not wanting to hurt their newly opened eyes I quickly covered them back up.  The mom had hidden herself in my plant beds by then.

I was hoping that the dead bunny would be gone, but no such luck.  As I peeled back the grasses I could smell it.  Also, flies were buzzing around like crazy and I was worried that it was going to create an unhealthy environment for the survivors.  I have no idea how much longer they are going to stay in that nest.  I had prepared for the situation, so I took a deep breath and scooped the baby out with my hand in a plastic bag.  

The boys came outside, and Josh chose a nice location under a beautiful blue hydrangea bush and we buried him there.  Josh spoke some nice words, and I volunteered what a delight that bunny had been to cuddle when placing him back in the nest, and we came back in so the mama bunny would feel safe to make her daily visit for feeding the rest of her babies.  

In other news, I have been making some nice progress at the posh club.  Today I got on the expresso bike and decided to go to the next level of bike trails.  I chose what they call an 11 mile route called "gut buster" (for obvious reasons.)  Gut buster is half mostly up hill and then half up and down hills. Except there is no gravity on the expresso bike screen so down hill is not the break it can be on a reality bike.   It was a killer ride.  The interesting thing is that I chose gut buster thinking 11 miles wasn't really that much longer than the 7 or 8 miles I had been doing and then as I was pedaling away I did the actual math and understood that I was oh so wrong about that!  Since the gut buster trail is a higher level the pacer bike goes even faster than before so I couldn't keep up again, but now I have a new goal, right?  I was thrilled when I finished under 48 minutes because 48 minutes is what it used to take me to do the much shorter trails.

I'm still worried about what I am going to do to maintain my current strength over the summer.  My thoughts have been (with links for youtube videos) 

1. try the Insanity Challenge dvd's like the stretcher recommended. It looks scary hard to me.

2. get some kettle bells and go to town with those.  I like this idea.  It isn't as scary and kettle bells can really give a good strength workout.

3. get a set of trx straps and do that stuff (some of it I already do with stretcher) with them.  I'm not sure how I feel about yanking on my doorways.  It doesn't seem as sturdy as I'd like.  The trx bands really test my fear of falling on my face.  Sometimes the stretcher will get on the floor under me like he is going to catch me if I face plant.  (He is almost as cute as those bunnies) 

4. find a boxing class near utopia because I LOVE BOXING

5. find a gym (and a trainer) near utopia that has a summer only enrollment- which wold probably end up being a reasonable investment because that dvd/equipment is expen$ive! 

6. swim, bike and run because that I can do from right outside my door, and I will do those things, but I think I'll need more muscle strength stuff.

My weight seems about the same, but according to my Omron I lost .2% more of body fat.  The other thing I am tempted to do is to not weigh myself all summer.  I don't want to schlep my stepford bathroom scale to utopia.  There is a scale in the house in utopia, but it is the scale I bought so my dad could weigh himself the summer that he stayed with us and my mission was to fatten him up after he lost so much weight after mom died.  I feel weird stepping on it.  I gotta get over that.  Maybe this summer I will actually clean out the few articles of clothing dad left in the house.