clickmom

Face the Music Friday 4/30/10

On Tuesdays when I force anyone who wants to be near me (Evan, despite the teen year hormones) to watch Biggest Loser it bothers the heck out of Evan that the contestants are always saying "The last time I weighed this much I was  fill in the blank"  It DRIVES HIM CRAZY!  It's kind of hilarious.  So whenever I weigh myself and I think "The last time I weighed this much ...."   I keep it inside if Evan is around.

As soon as I dropped Josh off at school this morning I headed for the posh club to weigh in.  With my fingers crossed I hoped that yesterday's 1 pound gain was indeed water and lo and behold, it was!  Instead of a 1 pound gain for the week I registered a 1 1/2 pound loss.  Whew! Another one (and a half) bites the dust.  And not a moment too soon.  The last time I weighed this much was about 8 years ago when Josh was one and I climbed on the treadmill every single day when he napped.  Then I started feeling like I was going to black out and my blood pressure mysteriously dropped to 60/40 one day and the bad doc I went to at the time told me to quit exercising and that was the end of that.

I went to the other gym today with wildmom.  I started on the stair mill, which was a newer version than the posh club stair mill and didn't have levels, only steps per minute.  I only knew that level 4 has 46 steps per minute on the posh club stair mill.  So I did more than 46 steps per minute and I did it until I couldn't lift my legs to climb anymore.  After 30 minutes, I traded the step mill for the easier gentler elliptical machine and luckily there were some good songs playing on the new gym loudspeaker so I kept to the beat with a moderate amount of tension on there.  After the hour, I was very very happy to hop off. 

Then I headed for the pool.  But I forgot my goggles and wasn't in the mood to purchase new regular old goggles from the other gym so I swam mostly breast stroke because the chlorine was driving my eye balls insane and I can't swim freestyle with my eyes closed.  Too freaky.  I swam for 20 minutes.

On my list of things to do this weekend is to pick up boxing gloves (because I think I am getting really into boxing class and the sweaty gloves at the posh club gag smell like bad compost-blech) and a nice fresh pair of open water goggles.

Also, I have to get some spray adhesive because I am in the process of building a portable Irving Penn inspired back drop for my new portrait project.  I'm getting really excited about it too.  

Tomorrow it's 8:30 AM boxing class with the stretcher.  I don't think I've ever felt physically better than this in my entire life.

Roight?

I've had an upset stomach since before the bar mitzvah.  First I figured it was nerves then I figured it was something I ate, because that happens all the time no matter how careful I try to be, but it's been so long I stated to think it was something else.

I had my one hour weight loss contest group workout this morning.  It was excellent, and I was sufficiently sweaty when I ran right off to my photoshop class.  My photoshop teacher has an english accent and after listening to him talk for 2 1/2 hours I find myself thinking in an english accent.  I hope I don't go all Madonna on you guys.  I do have the habit of picking up any accent I happen to be around.  I apologize in advance.  Roight?

After class I headed to whole foods for a salad.  I made myself a nice salad at the salad bar and got a large carrot ginger soup.  I came home, slowly ate up the salad, along with my standard bowl of supplements (still trying to reestablish reserves that chelation depleted) and didn't have any room for the soup.  Which is unusual.  I leashed up the devil, the poor thing hasn't seen any leash action since last Friday when we went our pre-bar mitzvah run and I walked her doginess for a good hour.  All during the walk I couldn't believe how full I felt.

Then I sorted out way too much recycling for pick up tomorrow and then began the picking up of kids process.  Then I began the cooking of the dinner process.  Then I did an earlier than usual dinner distribution to those wonderful kids of mine and I sped back to the posh club for the evening boxing class.  

Here is where I tell you more than you might want to know.  I was pretty sure on my way in that I had something brewing below the belt.  I didn't feel "right."

Holy cow folks.  45 seconds into the class I was so hot my ears were burning.  5 minutes into the class we had to get on our mats and do some crunches.  I'm pretty sure the music was loud enough that nobody heard me toot my own little tune.  How embarrassing.  I did the whole class, which I really like except for the part when I farted had to get a partner and I, the lone partnerless woman, had to partner up with the lone partnerless dude, who was very nice to me.  I felt bad for him because you know he wasn't hitting me as hard as he would have hit another dude.  He was nice enough about it, and gave me some tips along the way, but I am totally going to see if I can get some other woman to go to the class with me.  It would be much nicer without having anxiety over the whole partner thing.  Or I can just get over it and take what ever partner I get.  

I did think I'd weigh in today instead of tomorrow, but when I got on the posh club scale I had a one pound gain.  Not surprised because of not good eating yesterday, and also because I woke up looking all puffy with retained water.  SO I told the stretcher to erase my weight and I am going to try again tomorrow.  I ate well today!   Hopefully between the all active day and clean eating I can at least drop a couple of pounds of water.

more stuff I forgot to tell you

On monday when I was training with the stretcher I lifted something so heavy that I whinnied.  Making horse noises brings me to a whole new level of weight lifting.  I'm not sure what that level is called, but I'm confident that it isn't going to be pretty. 

I decided to go all whole hog with the training up until the summer.  So I arranged to see him again today.  But he accidentally double booked and chose the old dude over me.  I was going to give him hell if he ditched me for some dumb blonde stepford wife. 

I'll get to see him tomorrow for the weight loss contest anyway.  And I'm wondering if I have the stamina to go back to the posh club for an evening boxing class.  I'm really not a night person, but I think exercising twice a day might help.

I didn't have a stellar eating week.

I'm done with this round of chelation!  I kind of went out with a whimper, as my last two doses were supposed to be Friday and Saturday and I forgot Friday and by Saturday night all my supplements were buried in the hoarder style guest room ala: the cleaner from another planet to whom this an acceptable solution.  I took the last two doses Sunday and Monday and now I am on a break.  We'll retest after a while and see if I need another round.  In the mean time, I get to rebuild my stores of all the good stuff that got sucked out by the chelation.

Remember how the stretcher told me to hop onto the stair mill at level 7 for ten minutes?  No?  I must have forgotten to tell you!  I suggested I warm up before our session on Monday and he said it was a good idea so I asked him if there was something specific he recommended I do.  Then he asked me what level I do on the stair mill and I told him that on a good day I alternate between 5 and short bursts of 6.  He said "Do 10 minutes of 7." and I didn't think I could, so I got there 25 minutes early and set the level for 4 figuring I'd warm up. After about 4 minutes of 4 I realized that 4 wasn't doing anything for me anymore, so I went to 5 and then when I had 10 minutes left I went to level 7 and I did the 10 minutes.  I was sweating like crazy and breathing hard by the end, it didn't kill me so it is definitely doable.   I decided I have to adopt a different mind set.  I need to have a mind set that pushes myself more.  Today someone was on the stair mill when I got there (grrr!) so I opted for the arc trainer.  I tried an interval program and kept punching up the level until I got to level 10 and it wouldn't let me go any higher.  In retrospect, I think level means how far my step stretches and not necessarily how much resistance there is on the machine, I'll have to pay more attention if there is a next time.  I'm just so proud that I tried to ramp it up.  In the end I wasn't loving the arc trainer the way I love the stair mill.  Not sure when I am going to revisit the arc trainer.

I'm sure there is more.  Not remembering things so well today.  I'm tired.

interior weeding

There are so many things I've been too distracted to tell you.

I want to tell you that when I was picking Josh up from school one day last week this absolutely adorable little girl came over and chatted with him for a minute except she was totally flirting with him.  When she skipped off (too cute!) Josh turned to me and said "I feel like Archie."

 

 Also, I wanted to tell you how much I want to get our rabbi on What Not To Wear.  She'd never do it in a million years (I think) but she'd be a great candidate.  I'll just tell you one thing about her.  Purple tights.  See what I mean?

I am thinking of bringing back Face The Music Friday.  I was hoping for another internet contest.  I guess I'm more of a joiner than I knew.  But, no contest.   I did weigh in for the current posh club weight loss contest last Friday and the good news is that after not losing anything the first week, I managed 4 pounds last week.  Some of that 4 pounds is a redo from the last contest, so I am just going to go by my starting weight and my weight loss since 1/1.  44 pounds total, 24 since 1/1.  I reeeaaally want to get another 25 or so off pronto.  If I can get past this mental block, this stuck in the mud weight, this "I am so deep down in my unconscious scared of something that I don't even quite know what it is" hurdle, then I am quite sure that I will see there isn't really something to be afraid of and when I look in the mirror or get on a piece of exercise equipment I will not be scared any more. Instead of scared I will be very very pleased.  

And finally, I didn't clean up my house of chaos as much as I should have before we were expecting about 30 people to come over after Evan's services the other day.  I had asked my housecleaner dude if he could come over while we were at services to do a last minute straightening.  I called him on our way to services and told him I didn't pull it off and said "Just do the best you can."  By that I meant condense the piles and wipe off the dust.  What the cleaner dude did was take every single scrap of chaos (and also about a dozen pairs of shoes) and toss it into the guest room.  Right now my guest room looks like a really intense episode of Hoarders.  Every time I look in there I want to vomit.  I know I am going to have to attack it.  There is some important stuff in there.  And a lot of crap that needs to find it's way into the trash, charity or recycle pile.  I have to do some interior weeding.

big weekend - check!

Evan's big day is OVER!  And it went down smooth as can be.  

Evan was brilliant during services, he read flawlessly, and his speech was meaningful, entertaining and even down right funny.  I sat right in front of him and as I sat there looking up at my little peanut I couldn't believe this man-child is what my little costume loving messy food in his hair eater became.  How that happened I am not quite sure.   

The DJ turned out to be awesome- he had 30 boys a a sprinkle of girls on their feet and dancing for four straight hours.  The only time the kids sat down was when the DJ told them to go eat something.  Evan was smiling all over the place.  It was like a dream.  

Every single one of my utopian friends showed up and I marvel at what quality people I am surrounded by up there.  FInding that place and those people was such a gift for me.  I count my blessings.  Pal and his partner were there as were my babes.  Lil sis was there, taking photos all night long.  Go lil sis!  My steps were there as was one cousin.  Not having my folks was sad.  Especially during the services.

Parenting FAIL

I tried to wake Evan up by touching his socked feet, which were sticking out from under the blanket this morning.  He recoiled like I had acid for fingers.  It pissed me off so much that when Evan, 5 minutes before we were due to walk out the door on our way to school,  scrambled to print out some homework he had done on the computer last night, even though last night he told both me and the husband that he was finished with his homework, even after the husband asked EVERYTHING??  I kind of lost my cool.  Then there was a paper jam, and more bad parenting on my part.  Instead of my usual home made lunch, I stuck a crumbled bill in Evan's hand so he could buy the school lunch.  Once we got in the car, I got revenge on Evan through music, first with the Go-Go's (we got the beat) and then with the B-52's (love shack).  I even rubbed my revenge in by asking Evan if he'd like me to turn the radio up when he got out the car so his friends could enjoy the music too.

Then I came home to get Josh ready for school and I got a text from one of my utopian friends wishing Evan a happy birthday.

I totally completely suck.

The good news is that Evan's birthday's always kind of suck, so I didn't shock him or anything.

Also, Evan's Friday night service is over and he totally rocked it.  Tomorrow AM is the long service.  I have confidence in Evan.  He knows his stuff.

guilty

I can't decide if I should run tomorrow or if I should go to the posh club.  I'm leaning towards running with intervals, but I wish I had some kettle bells to come home to so I could work my core with them after the run.  I think I just came up with my mother's day gift.

I made the chiro cry today, and NO I didn't kick him like I am sometimes tempted to do during his more painful chiro sadistic moves or anything like that.  The chiro's awesome dog is in bad shape, it's pretty much day to day for her and for some STUPID reason I started talking about when my precious oscar passed and I was so distraught I couldn't bring myself to pick up his ashes from the vet.  Next thing I know the chiro is facing the wall and trying not blubber out loud.  Someone slap me please.  To recover from such a bumble we discussed how many people farted on him today.  At least now it makes more sense that he always has the window cracked.

I also feel bad for discounting my weight loss team mates this time around.  Even though they do not appear to have much to lose they are losing impressive amounts of weight and me, the one who at first glance would be anyone's guess as the teams weight loss advantage hasn't been losing anything.  Okay, that is a lie, I haven't weighed in this week yet.  (Ooops, now I know why I was going to go to the gym tomorrow.  nervous laughter -hahaha.)  But then today I finally realized how incredibly stressed out by Evan's upcoming bar mitz I am and DUH! during any other period of my life I would have gained ten pounds the last two weeks, so I guess holding steady-ish (I was down a couple for a minute- not sure it lasted) is better than gaining.  I feel like once I wake up on Sunday morning and all of this bar mitz stuff is behind us I can concentrate on taking care of me me me again.  

I had my nails done today and since I am wearing black to the bar mitz I figured I'd go for something bold.  I chose what I hope is a very classic red shade.  When the boys got home from school I asked them what they thought and they were speechless until Matt said it was "very Jessica Rabbit" of me. 

 

I'm pretty sure Matt doesn't know that (in every picture I could find in a 2 minute google search) Jessica wears gloves, and in my wildest dream I would never imagine that Jessica rabbit would be in the same sentence as me, unless it went something like "You know who your cartoon opposite is?"  and what he meant I am really not sure because I am quite positive that both Matt and Evan and possibly even Josh see me as about as asexual as a person can be seen, so Wuh?????  I am not going to lose any sleep over this.

In the mean time wildmom told me a story today about one of her kids that had green tea shooting out of my nose and an entire japanese restaurant staring at me for my entire 5 minute non stop hooting and hollering laughing jag.  It involved iced tea, condoms, the freezer and a stress test.  I didn't ask if I could retell the story, but let me tell you, it will be a cold day in hell when I could top that story.  I'm kind of jealous.
 

what is true

Had my last workout with NEWT this morning.  sniff sniff sniff.  I'm really all broke up about him leaving.  I just loved his workouts and he was so easy to work with.  

Next week I start with the stretcher, and I think he'll do right by me.  Stretcher did scare me today when he told me how he was going to ramp up the intensity of my workouts for fat burning purposes.  I asked him if he wanted me to warm up before our session next week and he said I should walk on the stair mill for 10 minutes.  No problem right?  I just marched an hour out on that baby the other day.  But then the stretcher said AT LEVEL 7.  I almost fainted.  I re-explained to him that I had just described one of my more energetic stair mill workouts as level 5 with 5 or so minutes of heart pounding level 6 thrown in here and there for my (wimpy wimpy wimpy) version of interval training.  And I repeated:  That is on a good day!  Stretcher repeated his directions, level 7 for 10 minutes and then he said "You can do it", like I wasn't this delicate fragile spazzy flower that I imagine myself to be.

I'm thinking that when other people see me they just might not see the Humpty Dumpty version of me that is seared into my own brain.  It's fascinating and I am going to give this a good deal of thought this week.  I suspect that when I look into the mirror I see only what I feel and not the authentic reflection in front of my eyes.  Okay, truth be told, I don't suspect that, I know it is true.

I Laughed & I Cried

shorty

Is it just me or does the new KFC doubledown seem incredibly ....... wrong.  Seriously, at this rate America,  we will all end up throwing clots and dropping dead in our tracks long before we are eligible for social security.  Don't go there people, say NO to the doubledown, just do yourself a favor and do not go there.

I spent most of the day gathering Evan's life's photos for a little photo montage to show on his big day.  I loved the kid when I woke up this morning but now I love him even more.  I pretty much laughed myself silly all day.  This child has been making the same ridiculous faces (and the same gangsta hand gestures) forever.   Also, COSTUMES!  Prepare to see costumes.  When I finish the montage I'll figure out how to get it on youtube.  Then I'll figure out how to get it on my website. That's what I have kids for, you know, in house technical assistance.

My back was aching again today.  I got up, put on my workout clothes as usual but then I got sidetracked from my running plans by the 44 degree temperature.  My knees say NO NO NO to running in the cold, so I figured I'd wait for the 50's to hit, but then I sat down and my back yelled NO NO NO when I got up and in the end I took another day off.  Now, I am going to be honest here and remind you that even if all 13 of my readers did not show up on my stats I would still feel required to run if I had only typed in my intentions last night.  So, since I took this weekend completely off (I didn't even walk the dog today) I plan on having lots of energy tomorrow and I am going to head straight for the stair mill and plan on climbing for an hour before I do some weights on my own.  Okay, now I feel better having put that in print.  I know I will get it done.   Despite my lack of exercise, I did manage to eat well this weekend.  I really want to feel good next weekend so I am all over the good clean food this week.