A few weeks ago I stopped in to see my original pilates teacher. I like her a lot. She has a great perspective on life and also, she is totally hilarious. I could listen to her for hours and she's a great teacher too. Also, she's the one who looks and sounds so much like my aunt lillian that if I ever found out aunt lillian gave a baby up for adoption I'd stand up and shout "Look no farther!" Anyway, my original pilates teacher has a little box on her desk and in this box are a bunch of fortune cookie sized slips of card board and each slip of card board has a word on it. What you are supposed to do is pull out a word and reflect on that word throughout your day. On my way out of the studio after saying HELLO I automatically reached into the box to grab a word and much to my surprise got a word I had never gotten before. I got GRATITUDE. My original pilates teacher gasped, opened her eyes wide and half whispered "Oh, that is a great word for you! Think about it." My initial response went something along the lines of "Sure, I have so much to be grateful for every one around me is dying a slow and painful death." I walked out the door. I saw a brilliant blue sky. I said "Okay. Well, the sky is blue." and thinking that would be the limit of my gratitude and the last I'd think about GRATITUDE I stomped to my car.
As I go through my life since that day GRATITUDE keeps popping up. It pops up all the time. I can't shake the concept. Obviously the biggest area of gratitude I have is that my kids are healthy, happy and just fabulous. But little by little I am noticing that if I train my sights on being grateful for what is good then what is bad seems less of a big deal and much easier to handle. For example, when I am explaining my situation to people they are always astounded that my folks are living with me. And truthfully, it isn't easy at all. But then I explain to the people what a gift this has been for the kids who would not have otherwise seen their grandparents in the next 5 years and never would have developed the relationships and special memories they are making by being able to see my folks every day. So I find myself being grateful for this family time together. As hard as it is having my parents around, it is incredibly rewarding to see them growing closer to my kids each day and growing that specialness that I always wished could be there for my kids. I wanted my kids to feel like I do about grandma about their grandparents.
Also, I like to know what is going on and if my parents were in Florida they would not be as open and honest with me as they have to be here because here I am the one taking them to and talking with the doctor. They are relying on me to remember things for them.
Even though I am crazy with worry about grandma I am aware every minute of every day how few people get to ever have a 95 year old grandma. (I just love her tiny little stinky self so much.) I am so grateful that I still have her.
I'm grateful for this easy existence the husband gives me. I can buy three times more food than we need (OMG- did I ever over cook this year!) for Thanksgiving and not even blink an eye. I can have a teeny tiny little job because I love it so much I'd do it for free and not have to feel like I need to jump back in to the rat race and bring home the bacon. I can be at every dreadful school event they conjur up. I can go to the gym for 1/2 the day.
I can take pictures with my ridiculously over priced iphone and share them with you.
And when I am tired down to the bone I can get into my warm and comfy bed and have a good nights sleep.
Good night and Happy Thanksgiving.
i liked the train of thought...
Posted by: Amaranta | November 25, 2007 at 01:22 AM