On Thursday, out of utter frustration with my still injured ankle/foot I went against my alternative medicine preferring best judgement and took my injured self to an orthopedist. The completely indifferent towards me dude looked at my swollen extremity said "Let's get an x-ray" I said, "I know it isn't broken, I think I tore something". He said "Let's see" and I got the x-rays. He said "Well, it isn't broken" I said, "I know it isn't broken, I think I tore something". He said "Well, I could put you in a boot" I said "I'd rather not wear a boot" He said "I'll prescribe an anti-inflammatory for a month for you, you can see a physical therapist, who'll probably only see you twice and then you can do it by yourself and if it still hurts in three weeks give me a call and I'll order an MRI" I said "I hurt it almost two months ago, it's getting worse" and he left the room to get the prescription pad.
Since I don't know how I'll react to anti-inflammatory medicine cause I don't take much of any medicine, he handed me three sample three-packs of a certain medicine I have heard of before (because I occasionally watch television, but in all honesty, I couldn't remember whether or not I was supposed to be able to ride horses, climb mountains, eat in greasy spoon diners or have sex with middle aged men after taking it) and then the doctor said "Take one each day with meals" I assumed he meant take one pack each day, one pill per each of the three meals I am supposed to eat (you know the ones which fall between my binge/snack extracurricular meals). But he didn't mean that, what he meant was "Take one pill per day" which isn't what he said.
So, anyway, I couldn't believe I was going to take a prescription, so I just went and did it with out reading the carefully folded information pack that came glued onto the back of the samples. Guess who just took three times more of prescription strength anti-inflammatory than I was supposed to for the past three days. Current overdose effects include: headache, stomach pain, and frequent trips to the potty. I haven't experienced the more fun over dose effects of coffee ground like vomit, shallow breathing and loss of consciousness. Hopefully I won't, cause eww, I hate puking and if I get bed rest I want to be conscious enough to at least enjoy a few old movies on cable. My extremity is also curiously swollen right now, (as in the opposite of anti-inflammatory) and I think there may be some kind of water retention issue going on due to the over dose. I'm hoping that's what is causing it because these Fred Flintstone feet are completely creeping me out.
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