I knew I was in trouble yesterday evening when two things happened. First, the coughing got so intense, there was pee. No puking, but it sure sounded like it since Evan kept asking me if I was going to. Second, I sat around just waiting to put the kids to sleep thinking how chilly it was and how cool it had gotten. Then when I stood up I felt the heat that was my back which had been trapped between me and the chair. I get the shivers.
I change into a nightgown, a night shirt a sweatshirt and socks. I'm still cold. I get Josh settled. I crawl back to the den and count the seconds til I can get Ev all tucked in. I write out instructions for Matt (turn off lights, crate the devil dog, brush your teeth, etc...) bid him farewell hope he really does go to bed at 11, and tuck Ev in. I return to my bed, toss on an extra blanket and crawl under the blankets.
More shivers. The coughing immediately escalates to a whole new level of of attemped lung expellation. I am pretty sure some sinus came out my tear ducts. The nose begins to drip and drip and drip. As I create a pocket of hot air under the blankets it becomes harder and harder to reach out my one arm into the frigid room air to get another tissue. I begin to bargain with myself. Can I wipe my nose on the blanket? Pillow case? I do need to toss it all into the laundry, and if I could only keep my arm warm I am sure to feel well enough in the morning to throw a load or two in the washing machine. Right? I mean, how bad would that have been? A grown up can do it when 1. they are that sick and 2. they are the laundry washers anyways so it wasn't like I would be creating more work for anyone else. You'll be glad to know I suffered cold arm syndrome and used tissues.
Then I began to fantasize about the dentists lead apron. If only I had two or three of those I could sew them together and make a blanket that would feel just right. Surely the dentists lead apron would keep me warm. I imagined all the shapes and sizes I could create from those aprons. Yes, I would be very happy with a lead apron blanket, even if it was industrial tan. I'd deal with the color.
The I started longing for Nyquil, the sniffling sneezing coughing stuffy head fever so you can rest medicine. I had all those symptoms! I needed Nyquil and I didn't have any. Life isn't fair. There was no Nyquil in the house. I began to fantasize about taking some Nyquil in the den and being half asleep before I even shuffled as far as the bedroom. Aaaahhh, I am so happy not to be pregnant and nursing so I can take any thing I want. I can eat anything, drink anything and I can MEDICATE! Woo Hooooo!! Except, there is no Nyquil in this house, I knew exactly where it was at home. I could see the shape of the big green pleasure bullets, I could remember the burn of the liquid version going down. I longed for the buzz, for the inevitable drugged out Nyquil sleep. Oh, if only I could have a Nyquil.
And Vicks vapo rub. I would happily sacrifice any t-shirt in the drawer to the menthol goodness that is Vicks. I longed for the greasy lung relaxing coughing spasm reducing stench of the Vicks. If only those scented vapors could reach my nose I was sure my lungs would just relax and I could fall asleep in heavenly state of drugged aromatic sleep of the feverishly ill.
Eventually I slept, but it was no good. It was fitful and restless.
Jailbait just showed up, The kids are taken care of so I am back to bed.
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