Looking for something different to do today we went to the local "sports center" There, we went on a couple of rounds of go carts, very fun, but built for really short legged folks, which I am not. One wonderful realization, it was much easier to get in and out for me than it was the last time we went last February, on that dark dark day when Evan broke my nose with a golf club during MINIATURE GOLF. Who swings during mini golf? The ease with which I entered and exited the go cart can be attributed to my now almost 30 pound weight loss. I feel so good, I can't believe I am still fat. Seriously, if I couldn't look down, I would imagine myself as a really slim size 6 or something. (Truthfully the last time I was a size 6- I was 6 years old and can not remember what it felt like) Bottom line-feeling good.
After the go carts Evan wanted play mini golf. With me! My heart started to thud and my mouth got all dry. PTSD anyone? Luckily Matt didn't want to, so I sent Evan and Josh off with the husband and went into the arcade area with Matt. There we saw the air hockey table. I love air hockey. He loves air hockey. We are so disastrously bad at air hockey. So, ofcourse I immediately got $5 worth of quarters (a buck a game! criminal) and we faced off for the best three out of five.
Now, you need some background here, in the game of life I am a turtle, not a hare, as in slow but steady wins the race. There are very few things I do quickly, my reflexes suck, and that is just how I have always been. Don't ever toss anything at me while shouting "Think fast!" Guaranteed it will end up on the floor. I am not sure how my lineage even evolved because in the survival of the fittest, they should have been eaten by the saber tooth tigers. They must have been quit the clever cro-magnum folks, my ancesters, yes, they were the clever ones, who tricked all the others into doing the hunting while they worked on developing some new uses for rocks. We are slow.
Thinking I was about as slow as humanly possible was a pretty safe assumption until Matt was born. Matt puts a whole new spin on slow. He was such an easy toddler, he didn't run until he was 4 and then only with lots and lots of prompting, and then not very far. You can imagine this lack of speed would not give one an advantage in a thrilling game of air hockey.
So Matt and I take our sides of the table, jokingly snarl at each other and begin. It is the most pitiful game of air hockey ever. I'd venture to say that it would be easy to find people who could play better than we did by using their feet. I soon realized that if I hit the puck so that it went side to side as it approached his hole he couldn't track it and wouldn't even see it go in. But, I need not have worried since he was just as likely to somehow tap my hits backwards into his own hole. He even managed to score for me in the goal he was supposed to be protecting when I didn't hit the puck back, and it was going real slow. He realized that if he managed to shoot his straight and fast I was more likely to miss it.
We were laughing so hard I had to run off to ladies room after the third game. It is even more of a challenge to play with ones legs in the crossed position. All the while there was a maybe seven year old kid watching us, totally not understanding how two such pathetic players could be having a good time. I could tell he wanted to ask me if we were for real, but just couldn't bring himself to talk to a stranger who just might be insane. So, I laughed louder. We were laughing and doing victory dances, and it if you think our playing was weird....
I won the first three games, and Matt took the fourth by a point. He declared the winner of the fifth would be the champion, and he used his straight and fast technique on me to obtain victory. We had such a great time, and I was so appreciative of it.
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