There is a good reason I do not own a gun. I do not own a gun because I would use a gun if I owned a gun. A perfect example of someone I would like to use a gun on is the A**hole, who just had to cut in front of me yesterday on the Bruckner expressway. He couldn't cut in behind me, or in front of the vehicle in front of me, the one I was following, he had to cut in between me and the vehicle I was following. Did he use his signals? No. He just started to wander sideways towards my vehicle, so I gave him a little "Hey, hey, my vehicle is already in this spot" honk. Then he kept coming, so I gave him the "I am not getting out of your way buddy." honk. He turned around and gave me a sneer that I am sure makes him a total psychopath, and he jerked his wheel towards my lane, forcing his crappy tin box against my massive truck, scraping the side of his beat up old Acura with Delaware plates (Yes, I have them written down) with the corner of my brand new front fender! Yes, Sylvia has been battered again. She has been mine for a short month and has withstood not one but two assualts.
Well, this A**hole just drives on and on as if he didn't do anything, and I continue to drive on and on behind him seething with a venom that is beyond description, fantasing about what I'd like to do with him, yet knowing he is a sick and dangerous man, and I can't do anything crazy because not only do I have my 3 children in the car who are blissfully unaware of what is going on, but my 6 year old nephew is in there with us too. They are all thankfully plugged in to the DVD system watching Pee Wee's Big Adventure (after wordlessly watching the whole movie they would declare it the worst movie ever) and haven't experienced the horrid new car metal scraping noise or my incessant curing that followed.
And that is why I do not own a gun. I would have totally blew this guys brains out on the spot. That being said, if you own a gun, are willing to defend my honor and happen to recognize him in your journeys....(kidding!)
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