My dad, because maybe he is testing the strength of my heart tonight, told me that scumcle called him and told him that when he went to see grandma she told him that she was "bored and unstimulated" at the nursing home and wanted to "break out." Scumcle is worried that she not being intellectually challenged. Dad, being the good dad that he is said something to put scumcle in his place (go dad!) but still, what a shit head scumcle right? I wish I could just forget about scumcle and never hear from him or about him again. But I would still want my statue back.
I took Josh to hang out at lil sis's today. In a uncharacteristically stupid and harmful move Josh decided to drop half filled with water plastic pail on my 9 year old nephew's head. What's that word for a big head bump? According to my thesaurus any of these will do: lump, knob, swelling , protuberance, bump and burl. And I think burl is only something you get on a tree, but I stuck it in that list because of how the word just kind of flows off my tongue like sweet dessert liquer. Buuuurl. It seems quite fitting actually. If there was a medal for speedy head buuuurl formation my nephew could have gotten the gold. Because no sooner did the sickening sound of weighted plastic colliding with skull hit my ears than did the neph call out "Oww! I have a bump!"
And he was knot kidding. (guess who is getting tired as she types tonight!)
OMG folks, I though the kid was going to go all airhead commercial on my because that thing got swollen fast. Lil sis commanded me to run for ice, which I did and thankfully it all unswelled pretty fast too. Man, I hate being the mom of the kid that did the idiotic thing. It doesn't happen often, but when it does, it sucks! And Josh, who normally does not put himself in the position of needing to apologize finds it very difficult to choke those magic words out. He almost got his own little mommy special delivery protuberance because he did not cooperate in the apology part of the after party but fortunately he did eventually choke out a lame- apology along with a whisper of a "I didn't mean to hurt you." Just in the nick of time.
When the husband's visitors came last weekend one couple brought their almost 7 year old daughter. I sat Josh next to her at dinner in hopes of getting them friendly. Finally the pretty young thing turns to Josh and coyly says "I have a lot of clothes." (hair flip) Josh sees her wardrobe and shoots back with a "I have a lot of video games." Ooouch, score points for 21st century technology! So pretty young thing, not to be out consumered by a lowly prepubescent male offers up an all encompassing "I have a lot of toys." Josh, not one to beat around the bush leans forward on his elbows and stops her dead in her tracks with this come back of the week: "So, tell me, exactly where are we going with all this?"