So, the bitch realtor quit on me. Seriously!! She wasted 2 valuable pre-house sale-season months of my time and then she flat out quit because I pointed out to her that it was she who cancelled our last appointment when she tried to blame me and she backed the fuck out. She is now on my list of people I'd like to be in a dark alley with during a lawless blip in time. I'd punch her face to pieces. My anger here knows no bounds.
I just want to cry and hide and find a cave to wait it all out and then the ax can fall and I'll come out of my cave and start over without the drama.
My skin pre-cancer is weighing on my mind.
The husband seems worse (and by worse I mean maybe more tired - but is it depression- or psychological-as if that was even possible!) than usual but nothing I can quantify for the doctors so.... just plugging along here. I looked up some articles on aspartame toxicity and am completely convinced he has poisoned himself into this condition except no one will believe me. I have asked the doctors about aspartame toxicity and they look at me like I'm nuts- but the research is out there. No one wants to go down that route because in this country cash is king and you can't go against the corporations which will eventually control everything, period. I need a new country. 500 days of the monster named trump and I haven't had a breakdown yet, thanks mostly to the late show hosts monologues, because I need to know I'm not the only one finding this ordeal as terrifying as I am finding it.
I am going to assemble a rough draft (super rough) book dummy that Ive been thinking through and its going to be so sad, because its about how sad everything in my experience is right now so I am in that mind set which makes everything harder.
Its all just harder right now.
And I forgot to wear my mosquito netting hat this morning and if I don't have a dozen mosquito bites on my head right now then I don't even have a head, because under my hair is welt after swollen itchy welt. It feels like a 3D topographical map of a volcano ridden landscape.