Today I did some decluttering, which is essentially, mostly reorganizing, sorting and disposing of all the clutter. I'm slow as anything when I do something like that, but in my own defense, I didn't just hide the mess or move it to a secret location. I did it the right way. You should see my recycle box! It's overflowing.
Why the sudden impulse to clean? Uh, in all honestly, because 1. no one was ever going to do it for me and 2. the husband's childhood pal is coming for a visit.
I'm not happy about either reason,
- I wish a sorting, cleaning fairy would visit from time to time and do it all precisely how I would do it if I weren't killing my own brain cells by binge watching either detective shows or home renovating shows with the husband on the couch while on snacking on the crap that will be my own personal health downfall if I don't cut it out very soon, as in right now, today, the very next time I put something into my mouth
2. Even though the husband and this dude have known each other since they were 5 I can count the number of times they have spoken to each other on the phone the last ten years (on my fingers- even if I had had some kind of high school shop class band saw accident) and part of me thinks he is coming here as a "this might be the last time I get to see you" or "I want to se how sick you are for myself" kind of thing, and I don't think a person deserves that curiosity visit when they haven't "been there" all along. I mean, this guy isn't wasting a minute of his day to day time wondering how the husband is feeling or even (gasp) trying to convince the husband to live a healthier lifestyle. You know what I mean? I guess I'm kind of an all in type of girl.
The only good thing I can say about the childhood friend visiting is that when he leaves it will be less embarrassing if someone comes into my house and if I'm allergic to dust I will be feeling much better in a couple of days.
Speaking of a healthier lifestyle, the husband went out to buy himself some diabetes suicide food, and today he sat down with his half gallon container of vanilla ice cream and proceeded to hard chew it for the nest 20 minutes. Who chews ice cream so hard they wear enamel off of their molars? Mr. dementia that's who! I can't believe I had to listen to that. I wanted to poke my ears out.
Speaking of ears, I have been having less hearing disturbance episodes since getting and wearing the mouth guard from the jaw specialist. Saturday night I passed out on the couch without the guard in and woke up a couple of hours later to intense ear itching and the craziest sounds coming from inside ear which sounded like someone had stuffed my ear with cellophane that was uncrinkling deep inside my head. I almost went mad over it, but luckily I fell back asleep.
And also, speaking of dementia. I am working on the speech I am going to tell the neurologist off with if he is dismissive of everything I say again. I'm going to give it to him good. He's kind of an asshole. He's just a sexist brilliant asshole who works at the best hospital around here and I am just the raw exposed nerve who isn't going to be quiet and let him talk down to me when the husband manages to fool him and lead him to believe that everything is just fine. I have two months to pool and hone my anger. I'm going to do it too.