So, where I have the past couple of weeks? Let's see if I can speed report the last two weeks.....
Husband gets what I think is a way worse version of Evan's 24 hour stomach bug. Husband goes to ER under protest on third day of fever
Diagnosis: Heart attack. Three days later they transfer hospitals for a cardiac catheterization
Hospital #2 keeps him 2 nights- first to make sure there is no viral infection and second because his oxygen levels are too low
but then magically they say "Come get him, we are kicking him out!"
I walk in and HELL NO! He does not look fine, unless you think one of those squeeze toys with the bulging eyes and pasty gray skin looks fine. I get nurse and doctor they insist eyes look fine to them and patronizing condescending (I could fucking clock this dude into the next century) doc states "This is not a cardiac issue. I am discharging him. He is stable."
I bring husband him back to the house (under duress) immediately call physician who says GO BACK TO ER, we are in the house approximately 6 minutes and then we go back to hospital #1 and diagnosis CONGESTIVE HEART FAILURE
Also, Doc at hospital #1 recognizes eye weirdness administers tests and orders MRI which finds 2 itty bitty strokes, and diagnosis: Progressive Supra Nuclear Palsy
Go aead and google it if you want to cry. We can cry together.
He's home now, along with an oxygen tank because oxygen saturation still poor (heart failure) and some kind of room air to oxygen converter which sounds like there is a gigantic olympic sized pool filter operating in my house, or maybe the motor of a long slow carnival ride. In any case, I am pretending it is going to be a soothing white noise which will lull me into my first good night's sleep since this whole ordeal started two weeks ago. (But the reality is that sleep will not be coming any easier now that the crisis seems to be over because the machine which makes oxygen is apparently a fire hazard, since the guy who delivered it told me keep a fire extinguisher handy and to make sure the kids know what the exit plan is incase of fire- I kid you not)
Oh, in the middle of all this chaos sweet pea starts sounding like she is hacking up fur balls which is the first time I ever heard the sound of dog with kennel cough, which she undoubtedly got at the doggy day care, which is located conveniently down the road from hospital #1. I walked in there with her and she made the noise and they yelled at us while chasing us out with 2 cans of spray disinfectant spraying every surface we came within 4 feet of including the pavement in the parking lot. I wanted to point out that in all likelihood she picked up the kennel cough 4 days earlier when she was there last, but I don't think they could hear me over the commotion and the double fisted pssshhhhhttt of the spray cans so I just hung my disease spreading head and slowly drove away.
The husband got sprung today, not to the rehab which the doctors recommended and which he refused to consider, to my unqualified care. Because I know NOTHING about all this stuff he's going through and no one seems to realize that I am in way over my head -except me. I did have to go to the pharmacy and pick up the 6 new prescriptions they put the husband on. Waiting in the always long and slow line for the drugs two men raced into the pharmacy calling out and asking where the bandage aisle was and where they could find butterfly bandages. The pharmacists were way too over whelmed to help these guys so I gave up my precious place in line saying "I have three sons, I am the band aid expert, I'll find them for you." but also somewhat selfishly because the woman behind me in line was bringing her demented husband home from his hospital stay and she was freaking out having left him alone in the car. I needed to get away from her. After I found the butterfly bandages and explained to the panicked and apparently completely inexperienced to men how to use the butterfly bandages I rejoined the back of the line and the first two ladies on the line told me I take the first place because I would have picked up my prescriptions already had I not given up my place to help the panicked men. Then we might have made fun of men in general.
So I was in a pretty good mood on my way home when I walked into the grocery store to pick up food for dinner. A woman came in wearing a heavy and dark floor length skirt, a long tunic and a head/face covering. it was all black and navy and I soon realized I was totally rudely staring at her because it just looked so freaking hot and today was in the high 80s and humid and I was wondering to what extent she was baking under all of those clothes. I realized I was staring and made myself look away but foolishly instead of turning towards my cart and away from the muslim lady, I looked behind her turning my head even father and more awkwardly around and looked straight into the eyes of a little person. It was like I was on a movie set of ways to be rude. I was just waiting for someone to stroll through with a chimpanzee and a music box. Sadly, that did not happen.
But anyway, that's where I've been in the past couple of weeks. I only sat down at my actual computer once during that whole time and anything else I did was on my phone, which means my single texting/phone swiping pointer finger feels numb on the tip from overuse. I'm not sure there are words to express how bone tired I am right now. I hate it when I don't get my usual good night's sleep.