Typepad pisssssed me off last night by not remembering me and making me sign in. Then it would not accept any of the 11 most popular number letter cominations of the original password for eveything we are completely stuck in. So I gave up and went to bed.
I cheated yesterday and by cheated what I mean is that I had some fruit and pickles. First I had some watermelon because I was feeling too lazy too juice anything. Then there were cherries in the house, and then came the pickles while preparing burgers for dinner for those who are currently eating and to be honest with you I could have easily downed any number of fresh or jarred fruits and vegetables, but in the end I didn't. I grabbed some grapes while doing a final kitchen clean before bed. I think preparing food has been especially rough for me. I do much more tasting while preparing than I had realized and also yesterday I paddled and swam and ran around more than usual so that could have been a factor in my weakening will power too.
Also, in an ideal situation I would not have to smell cooking food. One whiff of anything and the rumbling sets in.
Don't believe anyone who tells you this fasting deal gets easy after a while. However long I last on this fast (cheating aside, it was fruit!) for is going to be completely by sheer will and determination. Perhaps if I were in a serene yoga spa retreat somewhere being handed glasses of freshly prepared juices between massages and meditation sessions and not having to clean out a freaking juicer five times a day and prepare food for the family I could say it was a piece of cake. In real life it is a struggle.
Speaking of cake I bought an ice cream cake to celebrate finding the canoe that I had unknowningly witnessed being stolen from one of my utopian neighbors. I helped her search the shore line and sure enough we found it stashed by a shared dock where the people might not realize it didn't belong to anyone in their group. The find=Victory!! Not eating the ice cream cake =another victory!!
One thing that had been making it easier for me to continue this was the huge scale victories I was seeing in the first four days. I forgot to bring my trusty heavy duty scale to utopia and instead thought I'd be just fine on the rinky discount store bathroom scale we have up here only because my dad (four years ago!) had to make sure he wasn't losing too much weight. What a cheap piece of crap! Sorry Dad! My feet don't really fit on the cheap scale and my weight can change by four pounds by simply rearranging which end of my feet are on the scale. Now I gotta go on faith and all the pants that I brought with me that didin't really fit before the fast experiment. I was hoping for a pound a day loss, at least initially, and in the first four days I had lost more (I know, water) than that. I was intending on posting a weekly pound loss number, but without my good old reliable bathroom scale, I think I'll just have to post when I run back to new town for something and get on the scale I trust. Now I'm thinking about all the things I do tote back and forth with me every summer and I'm thinking that taking the trusty scale too is overdoing it even more than I already overdo it.
I'm waking up to my seventh day of all veggie or fruit mostly juice fasting experiment. The headache I had for a few weeks seems to be gone, I'm definitly less bulky, and I am still committed to seeing this through for some period of more time. What a long freaking week this has been.