I would like to take the whole matter of what to do with Grandma out of my mother's hands (and uncle's hands too). But I'd like to do it diplomatically. Well, would it be diplomatic to club some relatives over the head with a bat?
Grandma needs a physical before she moves, so I phoned my mother (more to inform her that things are moving along than to really see what she thought) and I asked her if she would like to arrange the doctor's appointment or if she would rather I arrange it. My mother said she hadn't spoken to my grandmother about moving yet so she wanted to wait and do nothing. I wanted to scream, "NOTHING IS ALL YOU DO! NOTHING ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH!" But I didn't. Instead I told her I had spoken to my grandmother about it every day during our daily phone calls, and that grandma didn't really acknowledge what I was saying, but in any case she doesn't have a choice in the matter. I told my mom that I had been telling my grandmother that she would be moving near me and that she would get to see the kids all the time. My mother started saying that she would tell my grandmother that if grandma moved near me then my mom would be able to visit more often because she would have a place to stay. Now, I know that grandma is very disappointed in my mother who barely ever comes to see her. I also know that my mom is not going to come more often, and didn't want her to lie to my grandma, so I actually told my mom, that grandma wouldn't care if she promised to see her and that she should just tell grandma how great it would be to see my kids all the time. That was a pretty big step for me. I usually say nothing.
My loser uncle is going to be back in the states tomorrow, and I am sure he'll be calling me. He calls me because I am the last one in the family to write him off. I do have the pen in my hand though. Loser uncle broke the camel's back a couple of months ago when he took a piece of art my grandmother had made and promised to me out of her apartment. He has slowly taken anything of value or beauty from her. When grandma offered the piece to me I told her to hold on to the piece so that she could enjoy it. I think uncle is a vulture picking on my grandmother's bones before she is dead, and honestly, he disgusts me.
Grandma's birthday is Saturday and I am already getting worked up about spending the day with the extended family.
Also, I'm still reeling from the blog hate fest last weekend. I have a newly developed fear of linking.